I am no longer amused. I don’t drive into the parking lot and think ‘well how hard am I going to laugh today.’ Instead I think ‘they should really pull all the bullets from sporting goods or I am going to go chew on some.’ A lady told me yesterday, a fellow employee and department supervisor no less, that she wanted a bag for her donuts and hoped they didn’t set off the door alarm. I thought she was kidding so I said ‘those are some scary donuts if they do. I wouldn’t eat them, robot donuts.’ Her answer? ‘Well its my department and they are on the reduced rack.’ Me: blank stare. ‘Oh ok.’ I just put them in the bag and handed her the change. Seriously
I am only going to say this one more time people: TAKE YOUR FUCKING THINGS WITH YOU. This weekend was crazy busy and I had to chase 4 people down, one well into the parking lot. One left his wallet, two left groceries, and one lady dropped her badge and I didn’t want her to get in trouble. To top it off twice the assholes in line behind these people acted all put out at ME for having to return their stuff. I get in trouble when you leave shit behind. In case you’ve forgotten I’ve had a WIC check infraction, a uniform code infraction, been laid off, rehired but then written up. I’m not about to keep that record up. (By the way, there have been others that work the same positions I do that have had much more egregious ‘uniform violations’ than me and get away with it. Bullshit.) I have little patience as it is and what is left is stretched so thin right now that I am concerned for the next asshole that tests it.
Last night I got to work in the bakery for an hour. It was my best hour there so far. Why? Not the hair net, not the latex gloves – it was the fact that I only had to talk to one person, Pat, and she wasn’t a talker. Brilliant. Plus putting the bread in plastic bags and putting them through the sticker machine was the exact amount of responsibility I was looking for: almost none. I admit putting 6 cheesecake Danishes in the plastic bins was kind of hard but that was the extent of it. Pat was so awesome she didn’t even want me to lift a tray or throw out the wax paper with the frosting on it. She may be a control freak but I am over the whole retail experience. My big girl job wants me to call them to pick a start date. I have had to wait since Friday night to do this and talk about ants in the pants. One criticism so far of big girl job: numerous times I have sent them the GFolks phone number because my cell doesn’t work and was subsequently shut off. The email said, ‘need to set up a start date. Tried to call but line disconnected?’ To which I say “AAAAUUUGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!” I expect my family not to listen to me but fuck people! It was like the time at super fun retail world when the woman used 50 gift cards then still had $8 left to cover. She just stood there staring at me and I ran out of ways to communicate that no, she could not have a receipt until she paid for her shit. Then I literally saw a light go on behind her eyes and she said “oh my goodness I still owe you money!” Yup, sorry for saying it in German. Sometimes I forget where I am.